Monday, July 13, 2009

A wedding, a period, and a pregnancy announcement

Internet, I have just returned from the depths of hell! Just when I seriously thought life could not throw me any more curve balls, I got bitch-slapped from all angles this weekend!

First, my period arrived! Yay! Yes, only 8 days late, but better late than never! Of course it arrived just in time for our weekend departure to my friend's wedding out of town. Potential for romantic weekend in hotel? Ruined. But, I was also a bit relieved that it at least showed, and would like to credit last week's first venture into acupuncture. Hey, I gotta justify the $65 somehow!!

So...we're out of town, in a nice hotel, all ready to celebrate with our friends at their wedding on the Saturday. Irish Boy and I had a lovely brunch with the bride-to-be on the Friday along with two other friends and then spent the rest of the afternoon hauling stuff over to her future in-laws place where the wedding was being held.

Let me go off topic for one moment to say, holy hannah, her in-laws place was AMAZING! Right on the water with tons of property, seriously gorgeous. Total dream for me...someday!

We stayed for the wedding rehearsal on the Friday night and were about to enjoy a bbq with everyone when my friend (aka the bride) and her groom asked all of the parents to sit together at one table - they had gifts for them.

Well what happened next, Internet, will go down as the day I wished I had been instantaneously struck by lightening. Out of the little gift bags, each parent pulled out a baby bib that said "I love my grandma/grandpa" respectively. Oh. My. Fuck. They're pregnant. There were squeals, smiles and tears of joy. I stood there, frozen, praying to God I had a smile on my face. Irish Boy assures me that I did.

Seriously?! I knew they wanted to start having a family right away..but really? Did they have to get "lucky" so soon?! She's due in February and naturally had absolutely no trouble conceiving. Jesus H. Christ. Of course she didn't.

Now Internet, before you get all, "Wow, you're a major bitch and not a nice friend" on me, know this: I am thrilled for them. I am. I AM. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt like hell when someone else I know gets pregnant exactly when they want to with absolutely no problems, no monitoring, no dildo cams, pills, or injections. And perhaps what hurt a little more is that EVERYONE (brothers, sisters, other members of the wedding party) ALL knew. It was just a surprise for the parents - and me.

Why couldn't she have at least told me prior to the big announcement? We were together all bloody day and there certainly were moments of opportunity. She is well versed in what Irish Boy and I are going through. Is it because she thought it would hurt less? Because she was afraid to tell me? I don't know...

We made it through the wedding. It was a lovely day and while there were occasional mentions of the "good news" as other friends, etc. found out there was no major announcement made that night for which I was thankful. We even managed to drag ourselves back to the in-laws house Sunday morning for the post-wedding brunch.

So that was my weekend. My period arrived - hurrah! My friend is pregnant - yay and ouch. And I'm currently covered in enough mosquito bites to possibly be a West Nile poster child (fucking outdoor weddings!).

In other news, I went for acupuncture round 2 today and had 55 needles stuck in me this time! No electric shock sensations though. Am back next week for even more!

That about catches you up with me! I won't deny that the sting of this news hasn't gone away. My heart is still hurting and I went through a "OMG screw the break, we need to start up cycles again NOW" more than once this weekend. But now that my head is a little clearer I'm back to my original plan of taking the summer off and starting up again in September. I'm also still very aware that what possibly hurts the most is that we may never have this kind of a happy ending. We may never get the opportunity to give "I love my grandma/grandpa" bibs to our parents.

But then again...maybe we will?


Jennifer said...

I would have fucking died. DIED.

And I absolutely, positively KNOW you'll get your opportunity for those bibs.

Fertility Chick said...

It truly was horrific. And THANK YOU!!

Anonymous said...

You will get your chance, I just know it. And holy hell, I probably would've burst into spontanous cussing or snatched the bibs out of their hands and run away.

Sandra D. said...

I feel your pain. I've recently heard about a few people getting pregnant, and it stings every time. How much it stings depends on the person, and how I find out - but never a good feeling. And I don't think you're a bad friend at all for how you feel. That's a completely normal reaction.

As for your friend, maybe she didn't know how to tell you. Maybe she thought it would be better that way...who knows. I often find that people who get pregnant easily have NO idea what pain they have avoided. Ignorance is bliss, as they say...

jenicini said...

That blows. I have kept myself from buying the little t-shirts for gram and gramps, but I have a personalized tank that I was ready to take a picture in and send to hubby while he was deployed to tell him. Yeah, he comes home in a month. Guess that's out!

Mad Hatter said...

Wow. Totally horrible. It sounds like you coped really well with a really lousy situation. You're absolutely allowed to feel how you're feeling and I think you're a great friend reacting the best way you can. That's all anyone can ask for.

BumpBlogger said...

I sooo feel your pain!! It's so hard juggling between the RIGHT emotion (I'm happy for my friend) and the REAL emotion (I'm pissed at the unfairness of the world).

Jenn B said...

Each time someone shares their pregnancy I feel like I get sucker-punched in the stomach!!! I wish she would have told you first too!!! Some people just dont get how heartbreaking this whole process is!! Hugs to you for getting through it!!!

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