Saturday, April 3, 2010

Shagging The Smurf

Happy weekend, Internetz! I hope that wherever you are it is as warm and sunny as it is in my neck of the woods. We've been enjoying some unseasonably warm weather over the past couple of days and let me tell you, we've been taking advantage of it!

So, the title of this post probably has you a tad concerned that I either:

A) Lost my mind

B) Have some truly bizarre fetish that I didn't share till now.

C) All of the above.

Not quite.

You see, post-IUI, I've had to add yet another thing to my "hoping I get pregnant" repertoire. As usual, I have the fun of shoving those waxy progesterone suppositories up into Ladyville twice a day. Who said infertility wasn't sexy? Right? Can I get a holla?

Oh never mind.

So in addition to those messy buggers, yours truly is also on a wee blue pill called estrace which is essentially estrogen. It's a tiny little thing.

So you're thinking, no big deal, right? Easy to swallow even if it is twice daily? Suck it up, princess.

Brace yourselves, Internetz. Sadly, it's not something that I get to swallow. (This post is sounding dirtier by the minute.)

You see, that tiny blue pill ALSO has to be shoved up into Ladyville twice daily resulting in a blue mess that I won't even begin to describe for you.

Hence, "shagging the smurf" as Irish Boy and I have come to nickname it because there ain't nothing good when you've got blue coming out your hoo!

Are my two weeks up yet?

The things we sometimes have to do, eh? AWESOME.

49 comments:

Fran said...

LOL!! imagine that for my next cycle I'll be on the blue pill of your kind plus another, more famous one! I still don't know which way I have to take that one! Fran

sienna said...

we should get rewarded for the things we have to do for the sake of getting a baby!! i thought the progesterone suppositories were bad once a day, i can't imagine shoving something up there, only to have it leak, 4 times a day ... leaking blue gook is not my idea of a good time ... all i can say is "eye on the prize!!" ... good things are bound to come :o)

callmemama said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Mrs. Gamgee said...

Ohh my... and I thought that just the progesterone was bad enough. Well, whatever it takes, right?

Hang in there, girl!

The Boob Nazi said...

Yikes! I can only imagine.

Suzy said...

Hmm, I never knew there was a little blue pill for women! Ha! Keep your head up as it will all be worth it in the end!

Kelly said...

I feel badly that I'm laughing at your expense right now. I hope that it ends up being all worth it in the end!

Kelly said...

I feel badly that I'm laughing at your expense right now. I hope that it ends up being all worth it in the end!

Lanine said...

Yuck-Good Luck!

Busted Kate said...

Why is it blue?? I still don't understand this. It must be artificially dyed, right? They could at least make it some lady-like color of pink or something...

Good luck this cycle!!

pcostory said...

Yuckyville. I am not looking forward to the progesterone supps but now all I will think is, at least I'm not shagging the smurf! Crossing our fingers for you anyway.

Pre-Heated Oven said...

LOL!! Yuckkk, you poor thing! The things we do to our body just to get that BFP!

lis said...

a new layer of humiliation! if you don't mind me asking, does it *ahem* 'get on' irish boy?

Jenny said...

LOLOL this post cracked me up!

I've never heard of a pill you shove up your hoo, much less a blue one?

I certainly hope whichever Smurf you're shagging, it's a hot one (and not papa smurf unless you're into that sort of thing with old guys).

Jess said...

I am laughing so hard that I peed a little! Being an infertile girl is no fun!!

Lynn said...

LOL! Oh, that does not sound fun.....please don't let my doc get a hold of that one, cos I'm sure she'd get a kick out of prescribing it to me. Hopefully, you won't have to stay on it long!

Amanda said...

Hey Fertility Chick....
Can I make a suggestion?? No..well here it goes anyway...You need a fertility timeline on your site....because i am getting confused with what processes you are in the middle of. Just a suggestion. :) Don't yell at me...I know you are raging on progesterone..hehe

Andrea said...

A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do! I have to say that I am laughing so hard...shaging the Smurf...LOL. So funny!

So long as it pays off its worth the trouble :)

Sarah said...

Hollaaaaaaaaaaa :) Wow. Talk about "baby blues"!!! Yikes. I hate those progesterone suppositories, so messy! And to add blue to it?! Hang in there smurfette. Hopefully this pays off! :)

Amaprincess said...

So that would be considered Blue-hoo! Not to be confused with Yoo-hoo!

You are so funny!

Valerie said...

Those progesterone suppositories are messy enough. I can only imagine "shagging the smurf" on top of them creates. I laughed so hard when I read that. I love when others can keep a sense of humor and make fun of stuff like this like my husband and I did.

irrationalexuberance said...

think of it as holiday-themed in Easter egg colors.That makes it sound much more festive. Incidentally, I've lived through it, too. I swear I should buy stock in the pantyliner companies.

T Lee said...

Please, please, please promise that any child resulting from this cycle will be dressed as a Smurf for it's first Halloween...

Ashley said...

Haha. Yikes! I consider myself lucky now because I get to swallow my little blue estrogen pill and not shove it places! :)

lindsey said...

LOLOLOL you continue to crack me and at times almost make me wish I get to "take" little blue pills, almost!

R. said...

Hi, I just found your blog from the hop. I can totally relate to the blue mess. I've used the Estrace the same way far too many times, but I have used different colours (green and purple), one day maybe I will combine them to make a rainbow! Good luck with your wait.

Chasing a Miracle said...

LMAO! That is all i got... Just LMAO, i have been there, and i think it is the only thing you can do...
Good luck, my thoughts and prayers are with you xoxoxo fingers crossed

Crossed Fingers said...

ROFL - I think you need to trademark that name and have the doctors tell the girls that's what they will be doing. It is always great to bring a belly laugh to IF treatments!

liberalgranolagirl said...

Bahahahaha!!! Hilarious, Shagging the Smurf :-D

Clare said...

Hee hee hee you make me laugh! The 2 weeks seems to be going by slow right?? Wishing the very very best for you. xxx

BeEncouraged said...

lol Blue ugggh cant even begin to imagine the mess you make everyday lol

aladdinsane12 said...

oh god, that is horrific! i can't imagine having blue stuff come out of my...OH GOD that's gross.

Beautiful Mess said...

AHAHAHA!!! Love it! I'd say post pics, but...yeah I doubt you'd do that ;o)

Sending you SO much love and luck this cycle, hon!
*HUGS*

Sarah said...

Oh for crying out loud. You would think these people would come up with things that are a bit less horrible. i mean, its not like we dont have enough to stress about...and then we have to shove things up our cootches that do disgusting things. UGH! Hope this two weeks goes by super fast for you! I'm at 12dpIUI.

Katie said...

HAHAHA! I love this. You have to read my old post about the first time I had to pick up my estrogen pills at the pharmacy: http://fromiftowhen.blogspot.com/2009/10/vaginally.html. :) I hope the "little blue pills" help your bean snuggle in tight!

Chelle (hanwayink) said...

HAH! Awesome post :)

stillwaitingformysunshine.wordpress.com said...

OMG- that is unreal! When I saw that smurf I didn't know where you were going! I'm so sorry. I do like your having a fantastic sense of humor about it though :)

Jennifer said...

Been there done that! Gotta love the blue. Loved this post. It made me laugh out loud.

azmamma said...

oh my! I had not yet heard of those! I sure hope they work, otherwise what is the point of making your va jay jay blue??

The mad woman behind the blog said...

I have to say I love your sense of humor. Just what one needs to get thru this mess, huh?

BTW, the Hubs wouldn't come near this blue smurf. Thought is was gonna permanently shrink his junk or make him grow boobs. Men are dumb.

Adventures in Baby Waiting said...

Hey there. Just found your blog. Luvz it! I'm gonna follow! Good luck with everything. Sorry your smurf is lost in hoo ville, probably should have made a u-turn once he saw lady town!

TwoDogMama said...

This post was hilarious! I almost spit water out all over the laptop. Love it, love it, love it. Especially the title. Hopefully the smurf will turn into little smurfettes!

Vitamin C said...

New poster (and blogger) and found your blog through your husband's infertility blog. I read your latest post and thanks for the laugh!

Suzy said...

This post is cracking me up!

Hope it's all worth it in the end!

Waiting Lisa said...

Why is it blue? That just seems cruel. Who comes up with this stuff??

Jen @ After The Alter said...

I know its not funny but your post made me laugh..lol. Why is it blue? couldn't they have made the pill white or something??? lol What we have to do indeed! Hang in there!

lynne [jaygirl] said...

HI ya! New follower :) I too have PCOS, hubs has Male Factor Intertility and we are waiting for my cycle to being for our 2nd IUI. :) Happy I found your blog :)

Shae said...

I am still laughing! Infertility sucks! I went through years and years of it before I conceived my son. Now, I am going through secondary infertility. I haven't been actually "trying" since 2005, but not "preventing" either. Thanks for the laugh. I needed it.

abumpyride said...

wow that is something else! Thanks for that Fertility Chick, now I have a really vivid image in my head!!! argh and I can't get it out!

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