Monday, March 15, 2010

10dpiui

Wow, totally exciting blog title, eh? But that's where I am at. 10 days past IUI.

I must say, this has to be my most difficult two week wait ever. As I've said before, this cycle just came together so well. I've never had this happen. I fear that these final days will be nothing short of excruciating as I wait and do everything in my power to ward off my period.

Last night, I did the worst thing, Internetz. Really, an awful thing. In fact, I'm hanging my head in shame as I type.

Last night, all night (well okay for a good number of hours), I googled. Oh, I googled good.

I wasn't going to. I had self-banned myself from all things Google during this waiting game. But last night I caved.

You see I was cramping something fierce yesterday. Frequently. It freaked me out. It rattled me enough to fear that my period was not only coming, but coming early. I have to confess that I'm still kind of wondering what the heck was going on down in Ladyville yesterday since it is still early days all things considered.

So I went there. I googled. At first, it was great. There was the elation of what the cramps might be! Oh! Oh! Say it is for me too!

But then I took it too far. I paid for my illicit googling and was filled with dread and despair. Let's all give Google a good fist shake for good measure!

So here I sit - banned from Google (again) - and waiting.

Will I pee on a stick (POAS) before the week is up?

At this point, I'm saying no. But, judging from my Google track record above, let's not get too hasty.

Can I share a fantasy with you, Internetz? Don't worry, it's not THAT kind of fantasy.

Oh Wednesday, it's St. Patrick's Day. As you know, I'm married to a born and bred Irishman. So St. Patrick's Day is kind of a big deal. My crazy fantasy is that I would POAS that morning and it would be positive - luck o' the Irish you know. Can you imagine the glee that I would have giving him that news on such a day? Cliche, perhaps. But in our little world it would be very cool.

But after last nights cramping episode, I'm not sure if I can risk it. For my last two IUI's, I was always spotting a day or two before beta. By the time I actually would go for the beta (required by my clinic no matter what) I was always in full blown CD-1. This time, I'd just be happy to make it to beta with the possibility of something great still there. I know the waiting will drive me nuts - but as crazy as it makes me - there is this little spark of joy for what could be that keeps me going.

Stay away period, stay away! Even if I'm only basking in a fantasy for a little longer!

61 comments:

jenicini said...

Bask in it! :)

Heather said...

STAY AWAY PERIOD!

Mad Hatter said...

I think this calls for a little Irish blessing...

May the leprechauns be near you
To spread luck along your way
And may all the Irish angels
Smile upon you on St. Patrick's Day

Crossing everything for you, lass!

Love,
Maddy

2momswithaplan said...

I hope AF stays far away! So you googled... So what? Everyone is doing it! lol

I'm happy to hear that you were able to pull yourself away. Have fun on St. Patty's day!

Jessica said...

I'm praying for you everyday :)

Katie said...

STAY AWAY AF! And no more Googling for you, lady! :) Fingers crossed... I hope your St. Patty's Day is lucky.

TwoDogMama said...

I am a self-proclaimed Google addict as well. Every time we had a medical crisis, question, anything I would Google it. For hours at the time too I must confess. My husband threatned to lock me out of the computer. :) Just keep thinking positively and stay away from Google. Nothing good comes out of it anyway. Best wishes!

Francie said...

OMG, chickie. What resolve! I'd have POAS about 100 times by now. Best of luck!

Mrs Bee said...

Dear Fertility Chicks Period.

Stay the Hell away from her.
Or I'll stab you.

Love,
Sass.

Two more days to go my lovely, I'm praying for you!!

x

Kristin said...

Keeping my fingers crossed and wishing you the very best of luck.

OliveLEAH said...

Oh the fantasies, I was at the store literly in a panic because I couldn't find a bib saying "i love my daddy" because I was hoping I could POAS and have it be part of our V-day dinner... I ended up not buying the bib and getting my period the day before our dinner!

Allison said...

I hope the cramps are what the "good side of Google" said. Longest.Week.Ever! Sending you all the luck o' the Irish I can find!!

Crossed Fingers said...

AF STAY AWAY! I have my fingers crossed so tightly for you!

A.B. said...

At some point my husband blocked webmd from being able to show up in our internet.
I feel your pain for your brain. Good luck and I can't wait to hear!

Willohlady said...

I just found your blog and I've been reading through some of your entries and I must say you are hilarious!

I hope AF stays away for a long long time.

junebug said...

Oh Luck of the Irish to you! May AF twist her ankle on her way and be unable to make on appearance. I think that would be a cool day to get good news.

Courtney (AKA MommaRoberts) said...

Oh!!! Come Luck of The Irish!! That would be so perfect! Lets just hope cramping was implantation. BTW Google is EVIL lol I have to admit I am guilty of using it and beeing soooooooo disappointed! BABY DUST!!!

Rach said...

A positive on St. Patricks day would be the best. Really hope this happens!!

Glad I found your blog.

Katie said...

I get a beta on Wednesday too. St. Patrick's Day is a special day for my family as well, so I can relate. Best of luck (for both of us). I really like your blog; I'm so glad I found it.

Pregnant Yuppy said...

For what it's worth, I cramped all the time when I was pg. Think of it as your uterus stretching out to make room for your baby.

May all of the luck of the Irish be with you whenever you test!

Kim said...

A St Patty's Positive!!! I love it- and I think it would be fabulous in so many ways. Eat a bowl of Lucky Charms too!!! ;)

Katie said...

I'm your newest follower from Friday Follow...thanks for visiting me.

Michelle said...

That is a very exciting blog title! I love it actually, it means something good is happening.
Keeping all my 50% Irish fingers crossed for a St. Pattys Day +.

Blondie said...

You are too funny. I have also been known to be guilty of googling. I try SO hard EVERY cycle to avoid it, but I just can't fight it. Ah, the torture we put ourselves through :) Good luck, hoping for good news!

Sarah said...

Hi, my name is Sarah, and I'm a google addict. No shame. :) I especially indulge in google-land regarding all things period, pregnancy, miscarriage, etc. In fact, I think if the Google search box on my laptop could bitchslap me, it would. I am so routing for you and looking forward to hearing some happy news :) That fantasy is awesome, btw. Hoping you guys will be so lucky! :)

Lovin Ma Soldier said...

I sure hope it stays away for you! AF is such a pain in the ass!

I have no self control and with pregnancy tests and will use the crap outta them! If I could put a PT block on my debt card believe me I would!

Fingers are crossed that the luck of the Irish will come through and it'll be an awesome day! :)

Jen @ After The Alter said...

Could it be implantation cramping?? I have certainly heard of that:) I wish you nothing but the best of luck!! I hope this is it!!!

Jen @ After The Alter said...

Could it be implantation cramping?? I have certainly heard of that:) I wish you nothing but the best of luck!! I hope this is it!!!

Kindra said...

I say keep Googling. Google till your fingers fall off, indulging your crazies is therapeutic. Just remember that the internet is a mile wide and an inch deep.

callmemama said...

Googling is a double-edged sword, that is for sure. I hope you had the good kind of cramping :). Myself, I've never actually had cramping BEFORE AF, so for me that would be a good symptom. I'm wishing you the luck of the Irish this week, and hoping you get a BFP :).

Jen J. said...

Stay away Fertility Chick's period - stay away! ::shakes fist at Dr. Google::

I wouldn't base too much off cramps alone - it could be your period on the way OR it could be a little one snuggling in! I had lots of cramping in the days following my IVF...I was so sure the cycle was over. Even started spotting, so I POAS - BFP! I'm hoping this is it for you! GL!

Jennifer said...

I'm definitely praying for a wonderful announcement on St. Patrick's Day!! That period better stay away! ((HUGS))

Dea.nna said...

I'm right there with ya...10dpIUI today for me too. Stay away period!!! I'm definitely going to POAS Wed. We're going out that night and if I get bad news, I will drown my sorrows in green beer! I hope you see your BFP on Wed (am me too!) Fingers crossed!!!

Coco said...

Thanks for the comment!

I have *those* types of fantasies every month! ;) Hopefully this one will come true for you!

Laura said...

Praying for you! I too am a Google addict, so you're not alone! I'm 7dp5dt (or to make it easy 12dpo)and I sooo want to poas but my husband hid all the tests! I have had mild cramping, more pulling sort of twinges, but today, not much of anything. My Google research has pretty much come to this: everybody's different! So, hoping for a St. Paddy's Day BFP for you! Love your blog. Best wishes, Laura

Holly said...

praying the luck of the Irish is with you and you get that BFP!!

Audrey said...

Let's form Googlers Anonymous. I am a full-blown addict and would also like to admit that, along with cooking and crafting, googling is in my 2ww regimen and there's just no way around it.

I hope this is the last time you'll have to ever google!

Plaidy said...

OH man. My heart aches for you. So much. I don't know if it means anything to you but you and Irish Boy are very much in my prayers. Hang in there. No matter what happens. Everything will be alright.

Mrs. Gamgee said...

Hey Chicka!

I am sooooo right there with you. I'm 7dpo and going insane.

As for googling... I'm there too. You know that page on pregn.ology dot com? The one that tells you what's happening with the blastocyst and implantation and all? I know that page by heart! And why do I know it by heart? Because I have read it every cycle for the last year at least...

AF, STAY AWAY!!!! (we'll see you in December!)

AnxiousMummyto3 said...

Yes, Googling was a little bit naughty, FC, but I think you're forgiven. You've learned your lesson! Hang in there and look, if you have to POAS-just do it. It's better than Googling because it gives you the truth. You be good now!!
Take care :)

AnxiousMummyto3 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chelle (hanwayink) said...

AFSA!

Hang in there!! how much longer until beta??

subfertilefrugalista said...

Oooh. I don't think I could pass up the fun things you could do with the whole St. Patty's Day BFP. Either way, I'm hoping the cramping is good and that you make it to your beta day with fabulous news. Can't wait to hear!!

mommyinwaiting said...

I have to say your 2ww seems to be dragging for me who is just following it, so I can't begin to imagine how it must feel for you. I think a St Patrick's Day BFP would be a the best celebration for an Irishman - but to tempt the stick or not to??? that is the question. Good luck!

The mad woman behind the blog said...

I'm crossing my fingers for you too! I've got my 2 tests this week too (first on Wed, 2nd Friday)
I do remember having cramps w/ my first born (concieved via IVF) and I was freaked out....but all was fine.
Peace to you in your waiting.

Beautiful Mess said...

Stay away period! I read you Conceive blog and dammit I don't have an answer for you! I want to say test tomorrow because how COOL would that be?! But then again, what if....UHG! So I say...screw it! Test tomorrow or before beta! And I am sending you EVERYTHING I've got, love!!!
*HUGS*

pcostory said...

You will make it. We are sending you some good vibes. Yell your AF to visit me instead of you. :)

Mugsy said...

I had horrible cramping after my 3rd IUI. Always have cramps but this was way different...I'm crossing my fingers that this is a good good sign for you like it was for me!

lowfatlady said...

I hope af stays away and you get your bfp :) I google ALL the time so your not the only one. I have a feeling I will be the same way as you towards the end of this 2ww. I feel like I have more of a chance than ever before. However, I'm only 1dpo so I have a while to wait lol. Good luck!

Amaprincess said...

Hello Lovey! I feel like we haven't spoken in awhile! I always fantasize about cute ways to tell everyone when I get pregnant. I'm glad to see you do it too! Here's hoping that you get to tell your hubby the great news soon! HUGS!

liberalgranolagirl said...

NO POAS FOR YOU! You and Irish Boy enjoy the day tomorrow and I'l keep my fingers crossed that the luck of the Irish brings y'all a BFP :)

aladdinsane12 said...

best of luck! can't wait to hear the verdict!

and yeah, googling is bad. every time i go to webmd, i leave thinking i have some form of cancer of incurable disease. not good.

Natalie said...

fantasies are wat make life interesting, and hard stuff tolerable. nuthin wrong with do it. crossing my fingers for ur fantasy to come true!

Bridget said...

I am totally checking my blog roll to see if you've updated each hour. Every. Freaking. Hour. LOL I say bask in the glory of what could be, google be damned! (shakes fist 2 x for good measure) I hope you POAS and when it's positive your should make the plus sign green... just for telling purposes. :)

Allison said...

Wishing and hoping and praying that the luck o' the Irish is with you today!!

abumpyride said...

Good luck fertlity chick, those could well be implanataion cramps going on there. I had news today that my last bastion turned pergnant - when I say last bastion I mean the one person who is so stressed out the whole time, drinks and smokes so much the whole time that you'd never think she'd get preggo. And she did. Now I am my own last bastion so I am hoping you get to join the other team asap!

whatsagirltodo said...

Best wishes to you! I just wanted to let you know I love reading your blog. I'm going in for my first dIUI next week. I'm so nervous! Sending you lots of baby dust!

Ernie said...

Have you found those websites where people track all of their symptoms each dpo or diui? Sooo addicting I can't avoid them! I am hoping for your BFP!

Kaz and Amy said...

Hey0
I just found your blog and love it! I will definitely be praying for your IUI procedure and for your emotions and thoughts while you wait. I can't even imagine how you are feeling. My husband and I have struggled with infertility for the last 2+ years. I'm excited to follow your journey! Praying for you!

stillwaitingformysunshine.wordpress.com said...

omg- i can't believe you stayed away from dr google for so long! hang in there - hopefully you'll be posting great news soon!

Mike Hussey said...

Doctors don't know what causes infertility in about half the cases in men, but think many men's infertility problems may be rooted in their genes.

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